Thursday, 3 December 2009

Depressed and ill

I am sat at home today because I woke up with a migraine. It started yesterday morning when I woke up with a headache and got steadily worse.
I am certain the reason for the migraine is a ery stressful day at work on Tuesday.
It began by a boy in my form making be absolutely furious. He came in late, would not take his gloves off, did not have a pen and then was very rude to me. He then accused me of being racist because I was crosser with him that another boy in the form who didnt take his coat off properly.
Then later on in the day I had my awful uear to class, one boy in particular was being very difficult (he is every week), he kept getting his phone out and playing music, distracting other. He was defiant and I ahd to send him out. There was a girl also who kept interfering and I had to send her out. They both refused to do as I asked, eventually they left but not till after she swore at me.
The whole things was very upsetting but what made it worse was that I recieved no help or support what so ever. There were no other emmebrs of staff in my department who could help me by taking a child away or keeping an eye on my class while the others were being delt with, I phoned the "student support centre" but there was no one who could come and take away the children. I even phone the head of eyar and one of the deputy heads and there was no answer on either of their phones. I felt totally helpless and alone. I was nearly cryong on the phone to student support.
Since this incident the boy in question was excluded for a day (but not a day that I teach him on) and I have now been informed that he is moving to my other art class. This will be no better as he will just disrtupt them instead. I have recieved no other help or support. All my head of department ever has to say is "you should of done this" or "you should ahev done that". This is no help as I can't go back in time!
Also yesterday I had the older sister of the boy who would not take his gloves off come in to school unnounced and tell me that she thought I was being unfair to her brother, that I was picking on him and that she could understand why he thought I was being racist. My Head of Department told me that I shouldnt have spoken to her. Lot of help this was after the conversation had already taken place.
So tomorrow I have to phone this boys parents who no doubt have already decided that I am unfair and racist. So not looking forward to that.
Also feeling today like I just dont want to be a teacher any more. Feel sick. Just want to be free from all the stress but I dont know what else I can do.
I feel that there is no support at all at my school for the teachers. there is plenty of help for the students but when the teachers are in despair there is no one there to help. No one cares.

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